Ron Mexico City: XXLMag.com | 2008 Negro Please Awards

XXLMag.com | 2008 Negro Please Awards - Coon Lighting Ceremony, Part 1

Yes, nigga. I said "coon lighting."

That don't mean your daddy new night job, neither.

For those of you who know how I gets down around this time of year, I'm going to take this time to open up the floor for worthy nominations in a myriad of negrolicious categories.

NP Coon of the Year (for excellence in racial embarrassment):

    * Yung Berg
    * Soulja Boy Tellem
    * Kanye West
    * Busta Rhymes & Ron Browz
    * T-Pain
    * Diddy
    * Plies
    * [write-in vote]

NP Negro of the Year (best overall 2008 negrous performance):

    * R. Kelly
    * DMX
    * Diddy
    * Soulja Boy Tellem
    * Kanye West
    * Yung Berg
    * Jim Jones
    * [write-in vote]

(Continue reading "XXLMag.com | 2008 Negro Please Awards - Coon Lighting Ceremony, Part 1")

Posted by Ron Mexico at 02:52 PM in "Negro, Please!": XXLMag.com, Coonery, Music, SOHH Classic, Weblogs | Permalink

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My Tweetness

Ron Mexico Slanguistics

DN (n.) -
Dumb Nigga. (abbr.)
Malbum (n.) -
Mixtape/album. A project that blurs the line between the two entities. There are both positive and negative examples of these. Most negative examples are packaged and sold by Amalbum Digital, baby!
Whoonery (n.) -
White coonery.
Negromantic (adj.) -
Stereotypically negrous love story. Romantic scenario manufactured for black entertainment. [See: Negromatic Comedy (genre)]
Urban (n.) -
Negrous in nature. Of or pertaining to Negro culture. Used in popular media to describe black shit without saying "black shit."
Mulletor (n.) -
1. One who wears a mullet. 2. One of hillbilly descent. (pron.: "Skeletor")
Gnome Sane - (n., v., ques.)
You know what I'm sayin'? (phonetic, colloquial)
Rapster (n.) -
1. Rap performer (derogatory). 2. Hipster rapper (i.e.: Cool Kids)
Ashy Diamond (n.) -
Bermuda Triangle-esque region on back where hands are unable to reach for lotion application (variable).
Cropdusting (v.) -
Blunt augmentation via foreign substances, usually of the opiate orientation. (See: MTW)
Coonery (n.) -
Coon-like behavior. Anything associated with the Flavor of Love franchise. Farnsworth Bentley's day job.
SDN (n.) -
Smart Dumb Nigga. (See: Katt Williams, The Pimp Chronicles Vol. 1; Ghostface, The World According to Pretty Toney) (abbr.)
MTW (n., adj.) -
More Than Weed. Laced greenery (i.e.: Woolahs). (PSA: Don't hit the blunt if you don't know/trust whoever rolled it, children.)
Whitney Diet (n.) -
Cocaine in a can, baby!
Touchdown (n.) -
A nigga that ain't all the way retarded, but just got a touch of Down's [Syndrome]. (i.e. Chris Brown)
The Negro Channel (n.) -
Black Embarrassment Television (see: BET). Abbreviated as "TNC."
Snapper (n.) -
One who performs snap music. A Franchize Boy. A Soulja Boy.
NPS (n.) -
Niggas Per Sentence average. Amount of times the "n"-word is used in a single sentence.
ManBearPig (n.) -
A dangerous mythical beast spawned from the imagination of Al Gore. A nickname for Tiffany "New York" Pollard's mother, Sister Patterson.
CB4 (n.) -
Cock Block [Level] 4. A nickname for Tiffany "New York" Pollard.
Cank Stoochie (n.) -
Nether-regions in dire need of hygienic attention. Nappy minor-league dugout. (see: Flavor of Love)
Blented (adj.) -
Blunted + Bent. Twisted. Slizzard.
Blent (n.) -
Black Lent. Ron Mexico's unofficial 40-day period of reflection and lament spanning from Dr. Martin Luther King, jr. Day through the end of short-ass Black History Month.
BDP (n.) -
Black Diabetes Pandemic. Kool-Aid induced-suffering. The reason Big Mama lost her leg. The new Black Plague.
Niggaball (n.) -
A sport likening basketball, but covered in Lawry's Seasoned Salt. AND 1 Mixtape Tour. Basketball-esque performance sorely lacking in fundamental skills. (see: Philip "Hot Sauce" Champion)

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Tuesday, January 06, 2009

XXLMag.com | 2008 Negro Please Awards - Coon Lighting Ceremony, Part 1

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