XXLMag.com | Def Jam Vain-detta 2: Bumfight

I’ll start this one off with a little perspective on how far DMX has fallen. DMX’s last LP, Year of the Dog… Again fell a mere 100 units short of a U.S.-record six (6) consecutive #1 debuts. He would have broken the record of 5 set by his previous record, Grand Champ.

[Blogger’s Note: That information comes from Wikipedia, which is a journalistic no-no, but I believe them niggas. I'll gladly change the lead if it's wrong.]

How does a nigga who has sold more than 30 million records find himself needing to take part in a bullshit MMA exhibition such as the Alabama Pride MMA event at the Birmingham Jefferson Convention Complex? There was a time when damn near any artist on the planet would have been lucky to open his show. Come December 12^th, DMX will be opening for Butterbean and Tank Abbott.

I will resist the urge to make a joke about opening a can of whoop-ass. Besides, he probably won’t be doing as much. However, crack strength has accounted for some unlikely knockouts throughout the course of my city street corner spectatorship. [Blogger’s Note: That’s alliteration, holmes.] I’ve also bore witness as a lone crackhead carried a couch up 11 flights of project stairs when the elevator was broken.

This is to say if Eric Martinez put DMX in an armbar, he’d probably break the shit and not receive so much as a tap out[", bro" ?]. That’s plenty reason to fear. Martinez might even fuck around and get bitten.

As for DMX, what would be the benefit of his buffoonery in Birmingham before a brood of bellowing Butterbean backers, you beckon? [Blogger's Note: See previous Blogger's Note]

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Comments

[geico lizard]

RON YOU DIDNT JUST SAY "BUMFIGHTS" ABOUT DMX??? You are too funny man even DMX has to laugh at this. Fighting for bologna sandwiches and crack sounds about right for him.

[No.]

Most useless post ever.