Ron Mexico City

The Boondocks - Season 3, Episode 7: The Fundraiser [Recap]

That's what I do. I raise funds.

I will go out on a limb and say this is the finest Young Reezy episode to date... Unless you count "The Story of Gangstalicious 1 & 2" as Young Reezy episodes. In which case, I'm not so certain. But this shit is "Homies Over Hoes" good.

The Boondocks - Season 3, Episode 2: Bitches to Rags [Recap]

Playing catch-up is fun.

Back when I was acknowledging W-rld St-r's existence, I loved how the height of their readers' observation was, "That's Ice-T and Soulja Boy!"

The Boondocks - Season 3, Episode 5 | Stinkmeaner 3: The Hateocracy [Recap]

[Preface: Ron Mexico City is in no way, shape, form or fashion associated with the organization of crusty niggas known as "The Hateocracy." I will also be getting you the rest of your Boondocks thoughts and observations in no particular order this week.]

The episode brings casual viewers up to speed with the notion of "nigga moments" early in the game. However, "nigga synthesis" is some shit I wish I'd coined in the slangustics myself. It's such a perfect way to describe W-rld St-r fuckery and the like. Niggas banding together in perfect niggerish harmony is indeed biology at work, children.

The Boondocks - Season 3, Episode 1: It's a Black President, Huey Freeman [Recap]

Like we always do at this time...

Define irony. WSHH not only promotes The Boondocks--which basically reviles the site's ilk at every turn--they also bootleg the shit! That is like compound niggerish irony.

I bet those Rerrlstar niggas just like to giggle at the word "nigga." They have no idea what they are looking at. I'm sure of it.

Tiger Woods & Earl Woods Nike Commercial

What could bring me back from an extended brain vacation, you ask?

Why, watching Tiger Woods wipe his dirty dick off on his dead father's back, of course.

he's just really into trim. there. i said it.

[Blogger's Note: This is Alyson Mance's first guest blog at RMC. Please welcome her to the Hatefest.]

look here. This Tiger Woods thing has gone entirely too far. At no point am I going to say that he was, in any way, right for the sloppy display of adultery he's committed as of late, though people do cheat, and sometimes they cheat a lot, and that's just something everyone's gonna have to get used to at this point. But a few things about the situation and the way media's shittasticly handling it, as usual, has me bitching about this shit like I care about the gossipy parts more than I care about the actual psychologically straight-up-fucked-up parts.

you see, everyone in the entire world is self-absorbed by some degree or another. Laden with schadenfreude before we even came out of the womb, we usually feel good when someone is embarrassed or feeling bad about whatever fucked up shit they did to us. So people generally like apologies just to see someone humble themselves and pretend to feel sorry about some shit they don't actually feel bad about. Therefore, when someone famous does something really screwy and gets caught, everyone in America is all pissed off until said individual looks remorseful enough and does all this bullshit to prove how bad they're pretending to feel, then everyone's all smug and decides to let him/her off the hook because by that time, there's probably something bigger and better to make us cream our jeans with gossipy satisfaction.

2010 DN Tournament Final

We have a winner!

You've done it, haters. You've pushed I eat da, I eat da, I eat da pussy to a commanding victory over Plaxico Burress. IEDPB cruised through the entire tournament. Their 63.1%-36.9% victory over the man who toppled Soulja Boy Tell 'Em, Gucci Mane, top-seeded Tiger Woods and The Negro Channel speaks volumes regarding your distaste.

In honor of this monumental victory, I have spend 2/13's period of Blent reflection on Harriet Tubman. It was her elementary school . I think we can safely say Sister Moses didn't lead slaves to northern freedom so that they could sing "I Eat Da Pussy" in front of a dancing, cooch finger-licking toddler.

I still haven't had a drop of "the white man's poison" either.

Chopper [Suit] 3-for-1

Why you would want to watch three Chopper videos is beyond me. I already told you all I don't want to hear another Chopper song until the suit gets a verse. Yes, I still read those WSHH comments.

Ole Shawn Bradley draft day suit wearin' ass nigga.

Street Dreams

Bring it Back

M.O.E. is My Life

RMC Radio 2/10/10 - Snow Day

For those who may have missed yesterday's show, please forgive the sound of my phone. I had a bad connection and can never tell when that happens until the shit is over and I listen back like, "Damn. I sounded like stir-fried shit." So, I already know.

We discuss Lil' Wayne's timely dentistry, Yo Gotti's border clash, Sean Price's baby shower, The New Orleans Saints and much more, as always.

Do your chain hang low?

2010 DN Tournament Championship Match

Here is your 2010 DN Tournament final match.

Final Four Results:

#7 I Eat Da Pussy Boys (55.9%) def. #1 Gilbert Arenas (44.1%)
#2 Plaxico Burress (53.8%) def. #3 BET Programming (46.2%)

It is now time to crown a champion, haters!

RMC Radio 2/3/10 - Into the Abyss

Moreffa da Albino Pimp returned for our first 1-hour live broadcast to guide an RMC safari into that underworld I spoke of last week.

Feel free to have at it if you dare come face-to-face with such niggerdom. It's at the end of the podcast.

We also discussed the DN Tournament Final Four, Kesan's (From Gs to Gents) music video/public appeal and "We Are the World 2010," among countless other shit.

2010 DN Tournament - The Final Four

The Road to Ron Mexico City has finally come to an end. Four DNs emerge with the 2010 championship in plain sight.

 

As noted on Twitter earlier, only one #1 seed remains! The people have spoken! Your regional championships have been crowned!

Elite H8 Results:

East:
#7 I Eat Da Pussy Boys (70.1%) def. #1 Lil' Boosie (29.9%)

South:
#1 Gilbert Arenas (65.9%) def. #3 Max B (34.1%)

Midwest:
#2 Plaxico Burress (51.8%) def. #1 Tiger Woods (48.2%)

West:
#3 BET Programming (53.9%) def. #1 Lil' Wayne (46.1%)

The Final Four:

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#1 Gilbert Arenas vs. #7 I Eat Da Pussy Boys

2010 DN Tournament - The Elite H8

Welcome to the Elite H8! Here's your updated 2010 DN Tournament bracket.

 

As Mama Mexico would say, it's gettin'... It's gettin'... It's gettin kinda hectic.

[CLICK HERE FOR THE FINAL XXL ANALYSIS]

Here are your Sweet 17 results. Thank de lawd there were no more ties.

East:

#1 Lil' Boosie (69.2%) def. #12 OJ Da Juiceman (30.8%)
#7 I Eat Da Pussy (63.2%) def. #6 WSHH Content (36.8%)

South:

#1 Gilbert Arenas (72.5%) def. #4 Gerald M. Saluti (27.5%)
#3 Max B (37.6%) def. #2 Katt Williams (32.5%) & #7 Rod Blagojevich (29.9%)

Midwest:

#1 Tiger Woods (60.5%) def. #12 Sexy Spec (39.5%)
#2 Plaxico Burress (53.8%) def. #3 Gucci Mane (46.2%)

West:

#1 Lil' Wayne (69.5%) def. #4 DMX (30.5%)
#3 BET Programming (67.8%) def. #2 Buju Banton (32.2%)

All the #1s are still alive, but Plaxico is the last deuce muffin standing. Hmmm...

East Regional Championship:

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RMC Radio 1/27/10 - The Rise of Moreffa da Albino Pimp

For those of you who may have missed last Wednesday's outrageous episode of our podcast that's got RMC in a tizzy--here it is.

Moreffa da Albino Pimp stepped away from his own upstart BTR show to grace ours with his musings. Click his name at your own risk. He's tuned his program into the ghetto chatlines of New York and... wow. Let's just say, he's onto something when he speaks of the chatlines as being World Star in real life.

2010 DN Tournament - The Sweet 16

Are you fucking kidding me?! Another tie?! What the fuck is going on, haters?!

As per the precedent set by Rick Ross and Buju Banton's tie, Katt Williams and Rod Blagojevich will advance to a three-way dance with Max B! Owwwwww!

Here's your updated bracketology:

As for the complete Round 2 results, dere dey go:

East:

#1 Lil' Boosie (79.6%) def. #8 R. Kelly (20.4%)
#12 OJ Da Juiceman (70.6%) def. #13 Ron Artest (29.4%)
#6 WSHH Content (56.9%) def. #3 Delonte West
#7 I Eat Da Pussy Boys (70.6%) def. #2 Chris Brown (29.4%)
 
South:

#1 Gilbert Arenas (85.0%) def. #8 Marshawn Lynch (15.0%)
#4 Gerald M. Saluti (61.1%) def. #5 Charles Hamilton (38.9%)
#3 Max B (57.1) def. #6 Bow Wow (42.9%)
#2 Katt Williams tied. #7 Rod Blagojevich

Midwest:

#1 Tiger Woods (74.6) def. #9 Barbara Norton (25.4%)
#12 Sexy Spec (64.7) def. #13 Michael Steele (35.3%)
#3 Gucci Mane (68.4%) def. #6 Frankie Lons (31.6%)
#2 Plaxico Burress (62.6%) def. #7 Soulja Boy Tell 'Em (37.4%)

West:

#1 Lil' Wayne (58.8%) def. #9 Chopper (41.2%)
#4 DMX (50.9%) def. #12 Joe Jackson (49.1%)
#3 BET Programming (56.8%) def. #6 Stephon Marbury (43.2%)
#2 Buju Banton (42.0%) def. #10 Kanye West (36.0%) and #15 Rick Ross (22.0%)

Round 3... FIGHT!

[CLICK HERE FOR XXL ANALYSIS]

East:

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2010 DN Tournament - Round 2, Midwest + West Regions

We have our first tie in DNCAA history. I've enclose photo evidence just to show you I ain't bullshittin'. I know how some of you feel about polls on XXL.

[CLICK HERE FOR XXL ANALYSIS]

 

We've set a new DN Tournament precedent by allowing both participants in question to advance. Officer Ricky, Buju Banton and Kanye West will three-way dance to advance!

The complete Round 2 bracket is as follows:

Midwest Results:

#1 Tiger Woods (87.8%) def. #16 SOHH Headlines (12.2%)
#9 Barbara Norton (60.5%) def. #8 Hurricane Chris (39.5%)
#13 Michael Steele (69.3%) def. #4 Charlie Sheen (30.7%)
#12 Sexy Spec (63.6%) def. #5 Joe Budden (36.4%)
#3 Gucci Mane (71.1%) def. #14 Tila Tequila (28.9%)
#6 Frankie Lons  (52.0%) def. #11 Lamar Odom (48.0%)
#7 Soulja Boy Tell 'Em (53.2) def. #10 Sammy Sosa (46.8%)
#2 Plaxico Burress (92.0%) def. #15 Beanie Sigel (8.0%)

West Results:

#1 Lil' Wayne (75.2%) def. #16 Diddy (24.8%)
#9 Chopper (66.1%) def. #8 Waka Flocka Flame (33.9%)
#4 DMX (73.6%) def. #13 Kid Cudi (26.4%)
#12 Joe Jackson (53.5%) def. #5 VH1 Programming
#3 BET Programming (77.7%) def. #14 Nas (22.3%)
#6 Stephon Marbury (68.8%) def #11 Alfamega (31.3%)
#10 Kanye West (53.5%) def. #7 MTV Programming
#2 Buju Banton tied #15 Rick Ross

Midwest Voting:

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2010 DN Tournament - Round 2, East + South Regions

All hate aside, thanks for participating in the 2010 DN Tournament! It's been a great success so far. It's nothing without you. This is a pivotal time for RMC and your support is greatly appreciated.

[CLICK HERE FOR XXL ANALYSIS]

But, fuck all that mushy shit. Here are your East & South region Round 1 results:

East:

#1 Lil' Boosie (87.4%) def. #16 50 Cent (12.6%)
#8. R. Kelly (73.6%) def. #9 Bossip (26.4%)
#13 Ron Artest (56.6%) def. #4 Mark Sanford (43.4%)
#12 OJ Da Juiceman (58.4%) def. #5 WSHH Comments (41.6%)
#3 Delonte West (78.2%) def. #14 Rhymefest (21.8%)
#6 WSHH Content (67.4%) def. #11 Annie the Chicken Queen (32.6%)
#7 I Eat Da Pussy Boys (92.1%) def. #10 Lil' Jon (7.9%)
#2 Chris Brown (70.8%) def. #15 Tyler Perry (29.2%)

South:

#1 Gilbert Arenas (77.4%) def. #16 Lil' Mama (22.6%)
#8 Marshawn Lynch (62.9%) def. #9 Bone Thugs -N- Harmony (37.1%)
#4 Gerald M. Saluti (83.2%) def. #13 Method Man (16.8%)
#5 Charles Hamilton (62.7%) def. #12 SOHH Comments (37.3%)
#3 Max B (73.9%) def. #14 Shaquille O'Neal (26.1)
#6 Bow Wow (73.7%) def. #11 Shakur (26.3%)
#7 Rod Blagojevich (53.2%) def. #10 Jayson Williams (46.8%)
#2 Katt Williams (86.2%) def. #15 Teddy Riley (13.8%)

Now, let's get to the Round 2 voting.

East:

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2010 DN Tournament - Round 1, West Region

Okay. It's Young Wayne on these hoes...

[CLICK HERE FOR XXL ANALYSIS]

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2010 DN Tournament - Round 1, Midwest Region

Sweet sassy mollassy! It's Tiger time!

[CLICK HERE FOR XXL ANALYSIS]

Welcome to the Midwest regional. You know how this works. Hate or die!

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2010 DN Tournament - Round 1, South & East Regions

It's time for the opening tip! I don't have to tell you fine haters what to do. You already know what it is. It's your boy, Ron Mexico City. We up in this motherfucker gettin' money and shit. Fuck niggas stay on ya job! I'm bout mines! [Insert silly slogan here] Gnome sane?!

I'm sorry. Forgive me. My webcam just went off and something came over me. Here are your 16 of your 32 first round matchups.

[Click here for full downloadable bracket and XXL matchup analysis]

South Region:

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2010 DN Tournament Field of 66

That's right... we will have a play-in bid for the chance to get blown-out by a #1 seed. Better still, it's a THREE-WAY! No nullus.

Diddy, Game and Lupe Fiasco will take part in a three-way battle royal for the chance to participate among the following nignitaries--I mean, dignitaries.

I know what you're thinking. "Damn, Diddy and Game are playing their way in? Fuck. This shit must be deeeeeeeep!"

...and it is. Without further ado, the DNCAA selection committee presents your 63 finalists for the 2010 DN Tournament:

XXLMag.com | 2010 DN Tournament Nomination Ceremony

You’ve waited long enough. It’s time to get the 2010 DN Tournament started. Welcome to the most wonderful time of the NP year.

The DNCAA selection committee has decided to eliminate the SDN and DDN distinctions. Instead, we’re going to toss all of our niggas–smart-dumb and dumb-dumb alike–into a single battle royale. Ideally, we’ll have 64 seeds separated into 4 regional brackets.

XXLMag.com | Dwayne M. Carter, Esq.

Dwayne M. Carter, Esq. That has a pretty swell ring to it. Then again, so does Dr. Carter. But, that’s only a rapster fantasy—not something he’s actually worked toward, right?

Actually, fuck being a lawyer. Dwayne Michael Carter knows there are plenty of other ways to use a law degree to become a powerful man. Ironically enough, he comes to this realization after having ended up on the fucked up side of said law. Young Carter’s also about to be pretty damn powerless for at least a year this coming February.

XXLMag.com | The Ron Artest Show

This may be Captain Obvious moment of the year, but that aspiring rapster Ron Artest is an enigma to me. He consistently exhibits the behavior of a nigga who fucks with the Leon Isaac Kennedy; that Sherman Hemsley; The Love Boat; Cagney & Lacey; Silver Spoons; Alfonso Ribiero; The Fresh Prince. You get the idea. [Blogger’s Note: OK! Well, damn! You can make any old television show sound like a hallucinogen, can’t you?] One would think Artest is tweakin hard off that gutter butter—except, he’s not all sweaty and shit. This is a total Father Dowling Mystery to me. After my years in the projects becoming a fiendologist, I thought I had identifying niggas who liked to get wet down to a science. I mean, what other kind of nigga walks out onto the set of a nationally televised talk show wearing only underwear and acts like nothing's out of order?

XXLMag.com | Dirty Money in Your Mouth

Consider this one yet another episode of True Recession Stories. Today’s subject: Poppa Diddy Pop.

Here’s the Rap-Flavored Blog Reader’s Digest version of what went down on The Colored TRL earlier this week. Puffy rapes Estelle’s twin sister and the best of his Danity Kane leftovers, then wipes his bloody dick off on one of Jay-Z’s best songs.

[Blogger’s Note: I had been meaning to get after Puffy for his molestation of “Where I’m From” for some time now.]

XXLMag.com | How High is Too High?

Fly, robin. Fly… Indeed.

I think it’s safe to say we’re all none too pleased with watching our good friend M-E-T-H OD, man. Method Man hit bud bottom by getting bagged on tax evasion charges. Didn’t we tell this nigga? Didn’t we tell this nigga not to fuck around with them people, ha? The mens and womenses of the IRS are not the demoralized cyclists in your Right Guard Power Stripe commercial. Can’t be treatin the taxman like Dean Cain in How High.

XXLMag.com | See Me in the Streets

“I went so motherf*cking hard on that n*gga he scared of me… [Bill O'Reilly] don’t wanna see me on a battle on T.V. with conversation and cameras and he d*mn sure don’t wanna see me in the hood, n*gga — he left me the f*ck alone. And I got friends like 50 Cent and Eminem, you know, so I got powerful friends who can get at his motherf*cking a** without him even knowing it. They can do that.”

-Snoop Dogg, Shade 45 via SOHH.com

Sh*t! I mean, f*cking SOHH dot motherf*cking com, n*ggas! S*metimes I c*n be SOHH f*rgetful.

XXLMag.com | Breaking News: Kanye West Didn't Kill Anybody!

Whew! I was worried. I was under the impression that Kanye West had finally gone on a nationwide murder spree. I always got the impression Kanye was the type to one day snap and strangle 25 teenage white girls with Louis Vuitton shoelaces.

XXLMag.com | Pardon the Interruption: Kanye Comes Clean

The following is an excerpt from Ron Mexico City’s exclusive interview with Kanye West in the wake of a Kanyegate-marred 2009 VMAs.

[Blogger's Note: Like he hasn’t done this kind of shit before or something.]

Ron Mexico: You’re famous for your ridiculous outbursts, but you’ve earned quite a reputation for awards show freakouts. Are you aware of this? I mean, you did—

Kanye West: Yo, Ron. I’m really happy for you getting this blog and your new show and all. I’m gonna let you finish. But, Bossip had one of the greatest black weblogs of all time! One of the greatest black weblogs of all time!

XXLMag.com | The Rise of Niggarachi

Niggarachi?! Snoop’s entire existence has been one giant fuck-up since the first name change, if you ask me. When even Media Take Out is alarmed, you know shit has gotten really bad.

I guess in the official name change for his new sure-to-be-terrible project, Snoop Dogg was going for something as epic as Makaveli. He very well may have succeeded—just not the way he may have intended.

They Should Have Never Gave You Niggas YouTube, Vol. 317

[Blogger's Note: I know this shit is old. I just caught it sitting in my queue waiting to be released since August 21st. For shame. Blogs deserve to be free!]

This little nigga needs some friends or some shit.

Why are we applauding some obviously disturbed latch-key child who'd rather hang out in the Apple store after school than go home? Niggas should be investigating what kind of child abuse and/or torture is going on in that crib.

XXLMag.com | ESPN & Def Jam Present: How To Make It Rain [VIDEO]

Negro Please video blog

XXLMag.com | Young Money: Every [Little] Girl

Best play date I ever had.

Wow. Thank you readers for pointing out a glaring omission in my 2009 BET Awards Notes and Observations blog yesterday. Not only did I glaringly omit an “s” somewhere in my original title, but I left out any mention of the controversial Young Money performance that may very well resurrect the Emmanuel Lewis “No, Go & Tell” child safety commercials.

On Michael Jackson day, no less... Oversight of the millennium.

XXLMag.com | 2009 BET Awards Notes and Observations

I know. I know. It’s Michael Jackson holiday weekend extended, which means I must suspend my quest of… holding our beloved negro music to Michael Jackson standards.

Like I give a fuck who catches feelings.

[Wayyy] Inside The NBA: Western Conference Game 6 Analysis [Video]

I got my hands on that Inside The NBA Western Conference Finals Game 6 analysis a little early.



Charles Barkley is livid!

Dr. Miracle's Weedwhacker Commercial + Miraculous Outtakes

This shit is why black people hate themselves.

XXLMag.com | Spencer Pratt: The Future of Hip-Hop

While some of you niggas can’t, I can proudly say that I’ve never watched a single minute of MTV’s The Hills. My only knowledge of Spencer Pratt and the herpetic smegma stain he married comes from watching The Soup. A couple episodes ago–of The Soup, not The Hills–I observed Orange County’s Most Wanted and a “homie” speaking that jive izzle-bizzle-dizzle shit en route to an evening of whatever the fuck these people do. I was immediately overcome by the thought that the next parked Crown Victoria on “Speidi’s” media whore stroll could be a pseudo rap career.

XXLMag.com | Drake: Best I'll Ever Blast

Word? Niggas is totin iron to the Drake Drizzy show now?

Microsoft "Laptop Hunters" Commercials

After sitting through my 5th or 6th installment of the "Laptop Hunters" series, I began to notice a very unsettling pattern in the clip format of these Microsoft Windows commercials.

KFC Grilled Chicken Commercial with Chef G. Garvin

If this ain't 'bout the most abominable of chicken coons you've seen...

Between Chef G. Garvin and Annie the Chicken Queen, both descendants of Chicken George, I'm about to deem all poultry as food that incites racial insecurity.

R.I.P. Chappelle's Show.

Pepsi Throwback Commercial

*70s announcer bass* Awwwww, shit.

Don't fall for this old "Pepsual Seduction" bullshit, my people! It feels great to know Big Rick is finding consistent work, though.

XXLMag.com | T.I.P.-o-crite?

“Even though all of our artists and employees are asked by us to be honest and open about their past history, at no time did Alfa[mega] disclose to me or Grand Hustle what has now appeared in the media. He essentially deceived us by failing to fully disclose the truth about his past and there is no place in our organization for dishonest and misleading behavior. As I have always said, you must take responsibility for your own actions. We at Grand Hustle can not support or condone the blaming of others for our own mistakes. I hope and pray to god bless his financial plans, but I don’t forsee me or my company playing a role in his personal or professional business. End.” -T.I., from IllRoots via Miss Info

I’m confused. Alfamega snitching would have been okay so long as Tip Line knew about it beforehand?

XXLMag.com | Russell Simmons: Your Rushcard Demystified

“The foundathion of being able to create wealth ith to uthe your money moth effectively. Many people in our communitieth cannot even get to their money without being thubject to overwhelming feeth. If you don’t have a bank account you pay around ten perthent of your income in check cathing and bill payment feeth. Bankth charge overdraft and inthuffithent funth feeth, moth of whith are paid by undertherved communitieth. Ruthcard hath no penalithing feeth. And Ruthcard helpth you budget and underthand where you’re thpending money, both at the foundathion of good money management.”

-Ruthell Thimmonth, Livetheeth interview

I’m starting to think he didn’t actually name everything “Rush”. He tried to call it “Russ”, but everyone heard “Rush” and the nigga eventually gave up.

XXLMag.com | 2009 DDN Tournament: And The Winner Is...

After weeks of heated battle and catastrophic warfare, our field of 64 Dumb Dumb Niggas [as opposed to Smart Dumb Niggas] has narrowed to one unequivocally dumb nigga we can all look down on.

DDN Tournament - DNCAA Championship Game!

(Click here for XXL analysis & updated bracket)

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DDN Tournament - The Final Four

(Click here for XXL analysis & updated bracket)

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XXLMag.com | When T.I. Became R. Kelly

Whattuuuuuup?! Wuz hatt-nen? Awll my hay-tas… Please get at me.

As the DDN Tournament winds down I’m glad to be getting back into the swing of exactly what the fuck it is we does round hurr, know’m tombout?

Much like any other fan of The King, I’d been watching Tea Eye’s Road to Redemption religiously. All things considered–like government pressure and incentive to convey contrition–I found Tip’s work with the select group of youngsters to be somewhat effective. It even looked pretty sincere, even if slightly off-base at times.

DDN Tournament - Elite H8 Voting

(Click here for XXL analysis & updated bracket)

We're down to the last 8!

Submitted for your disapproval:

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DDN Tournament - Sweet 16, South Voting

(Click here for XXL analysis & updated bracket)

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DDN Tournament - Sweet 16, East Region Voting

(Click here for XXL analysis & updated bracket)

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